In her cover interview with Elle, Victoria Beckham has admitted that she ‘doesn’t have a lot of friends’. The fashion designer who received an OBE yesterday said: “I’m very close to my sister and a friend I went to school with, and then three or four others, a true friend understands that you can’t see them as much as you might want, because they’re busy as well. Everyone I’m friends with has a career and a family.”
In recent years, scientists have debating what makes us happy now. While being popular has always been regarded as a sign of success, a recent study conducted by Oxford University has revealed that is better for your career success to have fewer friends. Two years ago, I was coined a ‘social butterfly’, I had all of my best friends on speed dial, was easily attending three coffee dates a week and felt guilty when I declined a birthday invite. Now, I barely talk to anyone from that particular circle, but I have noticed a huge arc in my career, not only do I have more time but cherish the moments I have getting together with my true friends, the ones who will answer a phone call at 3am, understand my busy schedule, encourage and energise me. Indeed, editing your friendship list can equate to a more vibrant and successful life. Here is how.
You don’t have to invest in other people’s small talk or negativity
By taking on a new friend, you are adding another tribe to your life. They will discuss their partner with you, their old friends and possibly their children or parents. Rather than know everyone’s business and always worry about being asked for your opinion, save the small talk for the ones who will equally listen to you, not just those looking for a shoulder to cry on.
You will actually get things done
More often than not, a tea with a friend is to procrastinate. Think about all of those things you keep meaning to do but instead are too wrapped up in dinners, introductions and parties to you know, build an empire.
You can build incredible, life-changing friendships
Once you have found a select group or even constructed a tight group of friends, you will be able to invest more time in those friendships and people who can alter your life and your being. Rather than indulging in small talk and petty conversations, know the value of your time.
You can focus on your dreams
Be around people who can bring you closer to your dreams, people who can lift your spirit and encourage you to be the best version of yourself. We always seek to look for these traits in partners, but why not our potential friends for life?
You can be the best friend your friends need
By having few friends, you can actively participate in your friends’ lives too. You won’t have to remember so many secrets, have an opinion on so many rumours or have to listen to so many problems. You will have more time to dedicate to one friend, the one who needs it at a particular time. You will have time to come to their rescue if they need it and write a letter to them if it is a long distance friendship. Shoutout to all of my friends in America and Australia.
Author: Scarlett Victoria Clark
Scarlett Victoria Clark is Editor-in-Chief of Scriptoeris and a multi-lingual journalist. She has also written for Cosmopolitan and Harper’s Bazaar, when not writing she enjoys travelling and shopping for (more) heels.